he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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