I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
