problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i barfeds in our rink
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
