remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
