You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
