but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
areolas are like halos for boobs.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
