We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
a search helicopter?!
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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