Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
