My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize