it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
