Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
