another moral hangover. fuck.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
