no, he came in my armpit
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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