Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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