Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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