Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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