I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i wish my penis had a tongue
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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