just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
