That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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