I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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