what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
