my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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