Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Randomize
