I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
