Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize