i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
