Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
