Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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