If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
