as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize