OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
