What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
