the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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