If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
