We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Operation Purity has been aborted
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
