worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
