So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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