youre lurking in front of me
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
