how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
