I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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