This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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