She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
my nose is crying tears of wow.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
