Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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