They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
