were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
