It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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