My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Randomize
