I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
