i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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