K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
