Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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